Monday, December 5, 2011

I Needed Words Then

There are so many reasons
That I need words
Loss and pain
Love and hope
To feel, I first have words

The first night of college
in my first apartment
a thousand miles from home
I was a stranger
I needed words then

I was homesick
but also lost-
heartsick and alone
I needed words of love

I wanted to define reasons
For silliness and stupidity
Why I act like a child sometimes
And why I love it
I needed words then

I love the childish feelings
but feeling means nothing
unless there is understanding
and acceptance
Words help me understand

I used to hear a joke
about turtles that could fly
it always made me laugh
even that meant more
I needed words then

When I thought of flying turtles
I could laugh and smile
Just the idea of flying turtles
Taught me to look at life
And laugh

There was a night where it was dark
and I am afraid of the dark
all I could see was my cell
the lights were all turned out
I needed words then

If I could define fear
My fear might shrink enough
That I could go to sleep
In that night words saved me

In different times of my life
I needed words
Just to know what I meant
What had happened
So I write

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